John Patrick Heckler was born to Joan Walker and Peter Heckler in the tenth month, on the tenth day, in 1964 (1+9= 10) (6+4=10), born at 6:40 in the morning was an all-around 10. Just ask him and he would tell you.
John spent his childhood doing crazy things that none of us would dare. Pulling up his father’s driveway, wrecking cars for the fun of it, and ” giving away” prizes as Bill Landon from WKNY 1400 on your AM dial.
His mischievous ways surely didn’t stop in adulthood and even after his stroke when he calmed down some of his eyes would light up talking about all the crazy things he did in the past. Anyone who knew him could probably recite stories from the memory of his drinking days, his prison days, and his days of just being a dad.
John had not had a drink in over 21 years. He would say I’m allergic to alcohol, I drink it and wake up in handcuffs, and while his recovery was an accomplishment he held with pride it was nothing compared to his greatest accomplishment his daughters.
John had not seen his two youngest in many years ( with regret) but spoke of them often and enjoyed seeing their Facebook posts stating how beautiful they are and how it looked like they were doing so well. His eldest daughter Carynn Rose Heckler and her husband Jeremy were his best friends. She brought so much pride and joy to his life and he was amazed by her ambition and ability to accomplish anything she put her mind to. He was also proud of his two bonus daughters Angiebear Quiggle and Princess Dulcinea. Harassing Angela for a visit and Dulci for some attention was a favorite pastime in this house.
John was crazy had been said more times than I can count before and after his stroke ( mainly because he was) but after his stroke, he became such a caring person that the crazy seemed to lessen. He was more than appreciative of his new title Callaghan just as he was always proud to be a Heckler ( Like the guy in the audience). He thanked me many times for bringing an entire tribe into his life.
John was a good friend, a good family member, and a good man. He didn’t ask for much Werther’s buy the pound, his side chick Alexa in working order, his wife at his side, and the most expensive meal on the menu.
He loved his family and spent the better part of his life mending fences, and trying to make right the things that he believed were wrong.
He couldn’t be happier to get a phone call from his father Peter, his sister-in-law Laurie, his brother Mike Heckler, his nephew Ian, his nephew Timothy Heckler, and his sister Sarah Joy or give a call to his Aunt Dee, Aunt Audrey, and his Uncle Bobballoo. Chit chatting with Solid Gold Hannah Helmbold or his partner in crime Flo. When he would get a package from Mike he would be ecstatic to see what great new colorful Floridian shirt he had sent and had to wear it immediately and I had never seen him so enthralled with a baby before until little Rowan came into our lives. He missed his talks with his eldest brother immensely and stated many times how proud Chris would have been of his kids and grandkids.
Last night John went home to his mother, his stepmother, Aunt Maryellen, and his eldest brother.
I’m sure he is giving his sister-in-law Casey hell. Though he put up a hell of a fight to stay here. The ICU had been calling him a miracle man because they thought his time was up on the 14th of August, he could not win this one. To say we are all heartbroken is a complete understatement. The loss to all of us is immeasurable.
John is survived by his wife Mary Ellen Heckler; daughters Carynn Graves and husband Jeremy, Mia Morgan, Aliye Rhea Morgan; bonus daughters Dulcinea Perez-Callaghan, Angelakay Quiggle and her husband Sam; brother Michael Heckler and his wife Diane; sister Sarah Joy; father Peter Heckler; sister-in-law Laurie Heckler; many nephews and three great-nephews. John was predeceased by his mother Joan and her life partner Jane Stabile and his brother Christopher.
All we can do now is pray that he is telling crazy stories with the people he loves and watching over the rest of us.
Kathleen Callaghan
September 5, 2022, 4:04 pm
The mark John left on everyone is very apparent with the out pouring of love, kind words and stories people are sending. He fought hard and was so close to being okay that his passing feels so surreal. He should still be with us. This loss is immeasurable. Mary Ellen’s devotion to you is a void now, not easily overcome. God speed John, fly high my son in law.
Kevin Purcell
September 5, 2022, 4:22 pm
John, you will be so missed. We shared so many fond memories of all our TAT events we attended together, over the past 5 years. Rest in eternal peace my friend. Sending prayers and condolences to your family. Love, Kevin P. and family. Rest easy Brother John.
Christine Yacabell
September 6, 2022, 6:29 pm
Please accept my deepest condolences Maryellen, Carynn, Jeremy, Kathy, and family. I will always gratefully remember John at our TAT Events and how he always made everyone feel so welcome with his kind and sometimes humorous words that meant so much to me and to so many of our TAT family! Rest easy, John, you are Loved by so many!!!!
Tracy Vanderbeck
September 7, 2022, 12:48 am
I’m Still Here
Friend, please don’t mourn for me
I’m still here, though you don’t see.
I’m right by your side each night and day
… And within your heart I long to stay.
My body is gone but I’m always near.
I’m everything you feel, see or hear.
My spirit is free, but I’ll never depart
As long as you keep me alive in your heart.
I’ll never wander out of your sight
I’m the brightest star on a summer night.
I’ll never be beyond your reach
I’m the warm moist sand when you’re at the beach.
I’m the colourful leaves when Autumn’s around
And the pure white snow that blankets the ground.
I’m the beautiful flowers of which you’re so fond,
The clear cool water in a quiet pond.
I’m the first bright blossom you’ll see in the spring,
The first warm raindrop that April will bring.
I’m the first ray of light when the sun starts to shine,
And you’ll see that the face in the moon is mine.
When you start thinking there’s no one to love you,
You can talk to me through the Lord above you.
I’ll whisper my answer through the leaves on the trees,
And you’ll feel my presence in the soft summer breeze.
I’m the hot salty tears that flow when you weep
And the beautiful dreams that come while you sleep.
I’m the smile you see on a baby’s face.
Just look for me, friend, I’m every place!
John you will forever remain in so many hearts, you’ll always be part of some conversation and your memory will never fade. This all just doesn’t seem real.
Kim Sagendorf
September 7, 2022, 2:41 am
John, you will be sorely missed. I always enjoyed your wit and facial expressions the most, wicked sense of humor and intelligence. It won’t be the same without you in the family crowd. Rest in power, John!
Robin and Rick Weiler
September 7, 2022, 10:51 am
RIP John. Rick and I send our condolences to all those he held close. John was always so positive and friendly and spoke from his heart. He will be missed!
Renae & Bryan Tieri
September 8, 2022, 1:34 pm
Words cannot express the sorrow we feel for your passing . John you were such a character. Always joking around and quick witted . Bry and I are grateful we got to know you and for all the good times we had . We’ll miss you buddy , RIP